Friday, October 21, 2011

Spiritual Formation - Do you really want to be healed?

Last night I read a chapter in a book that I found myself underlining seemingly half the pages, connecting with on all sorts of levels. It's been a long time since I posted anything here, but I thought it was time to break that and share some of that chapter here.

Book: Renovation of the Church by Kent Carlson and Mike Lueken
Chapter: Spiritual Formation: Do You Really Want To Be Healed?

"Since the Donner experience, we have been enthralled with the possibility that human beings can actually change and become more like Jesus. We've oriented our church around this conviction. We have tried to take seriously Jesus' charge to 'make disciples' (Matthew 28:19). As we apprentice under Jesus, by God's grace we can

Put to death the misdeeds of the body. (Roman 8:13)

Be made new in the attitude of your minds. (Ephesians 4:23)

Put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness. (Ephesians 4:24)

As Paul says, we were therefore buried with him through baptism into death in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead through the glory of the Father, we too may live a new life.' (Romans 6:4) People increasingly immersed in the Kingdom of God will experience an authentic heart-level change. They will gradually become new and better people. This is not an addendum to the gospel but a central tenet of it. This is not for the elite few who are interested but normative for all who put their trust in Jesus.

...

Perhaps our greatest lesson from the past decade is that it is spiritually formative to be dissatisfied and unable to resolve all that dissatisfaction. In fact, there is hardly a better catalyst for transformation than to not get what we want. Sitting in the dissatisfaction, without frantically trying to resolve it, can do wonders for the human soul.

...

Ronald Rolheiser observes:

'Our lives become consumed with the idea that unless we somehow experience everything, travel everywhere, see everything, and are a part of a large number of other people's experiences, then our own lives are small and meaningless. We become impatient with every hunger, every ache, and every non-consummated area within our lives and we become convinced that unless every pleasure we yearn for is tasted, we will be unhappy. We stand before life too greedy, too full of expectations that cannot be realized, and unable to accept that here, in this life, all symphonies remain unfinished. When this happens an obsessive restlessness leaves us unable to rest or be satisfied because we are convinced that all lack, all tension, and all unfulfilled yearning is tragic. Thus, it becomes tragic to be alone; to be unmarried; to be married, but not completely fulfilled romantically and sexually; to not be good-looking; or, be unhealthy, aged, or handicapped. It become tragic to be caught up in duties and commitments which limit our freedom, tragic to be poor, tragic to go through life and not be able to taste every pleasure on earth and fulfill every potential inside of us. When we are obsessed in this way it is hard to be contemplative. We are too focused on our own heartaches to be very open and receptive.'

...

One man's story illustrates the split between salvation and transformation. We met over several weeks to discuss his struggling marriage. He is a long-time Christian and has been in the church for much of his life. He is well-versed in the language of the Christian subculture. After hearing his story, it was obvious his marital system needed to be overhauled. They had fallen into a series of destructive ruts, and no amount of tweaking was going to help. Since I was talking to him, we focused on God's invitation to trust and follow in spite of his circumstances. We talked about what it would look like to choose a path of spiritual formation in this situation. The only thing he could control was who he was becoming. In spite of whatever else had to happen, for the marriage to get better, he was going to have to get better. There were specific issues in the relationship where he had been passive and complicit. Moving toward Christlikeness meant counter-intuitive action. He couldn't keep relating the same way and hope for a different result. It was time for him to make a holy mess. He needed to courageously wade into some long-overdue conflicts with his wife. He needed to initiate conversation about the marriage. But this pushed him beyond his comfort zone. He kept hesitating to make a move. Did he want to be healed? He was stuck.

Now he is a good man, a nice guy. This man loves god and does his best to follow Jesus. Obviously, there are situations and relationships in life that don't get fixed (and maybe can't get fixed). The fact was, his spiritual formation might not improve his marriage at all. It is, after all, a broken world. But the end result of the marriage was not the point. The tragedy is that this man has drifted along for years as a 'happy' and 'nice' Christian, without realizing the gospel he believes invites him, indeed calls him, to transformation. He doesn't have to live with fear, passivity, and complicity. Transformation is possible through the Spirit of the resurrected Christ.

Somewhere along the way, though, it became acceptable for this man---and many of us---to profess faith in Christ without signing up to be transformed. Perhaps this inform's Dallas Willard's remarks:

'The primary mission field for the Great Commission today is made up of the churches in Europe and North America. That is where the Great Disparity is most visible, and from where it threatens to spread to the rest of the world....

So the greatest issue facing the world today, with all its heartbreaking needs, is whether those who, by profession or culture, are identified as 'Christians' will become disciples---students, apprentices, practitioners---of Jesus Christ, steadily learning from him how to live the life of the Kingdom of the Heavens into every corner of human existence.'
In our efforts to orient our church around spiritual formation, we discovered how tempting it is for people to settle for a cheap alternative rather than the real thing. Some of us are consoled by the fact that, while we may not be experiencing transformation, at least we are frustrated by our complacency. We are satisfied with our spiritual dissatisfaction. We may be dealing with the same sin issue we were a decade ago, but at least we are frustrated about it. We may even like the impression others have of us as being frustrated by our lack of spiritual maturity. If we can't actually change, we can at least relish the fact that people think of us as wanting to change. We settle for impressing a few people. As C.S. Lewis said, 'We are far too easily pleased.' As Jesus put it, we have 'received [our] reward in full' (Matthew 6:5)."

...

(and here are a few more shorter snippets from the chapter that I just couldn't leave out here)

~"We study to conquer, not to be changed. We dig deeper into the Bible to sharpen our understanding of its content and meaning, not to have it sharpen us."

~"We are afraid of turning grace into works. So instead, we turn grace into divine magic that does everything for us."

~"Generalities are a good hiding place. 'Jesus died for my sins' is less scandalous than 'Jesus dies for my out-of-control anger that severely damages the people I love most.' 'I'm a sinner' is easier to admit than 'I'm a lustaholic.' In generalities, no one is exposed. But no one really grows. Real transformation happens in the unattractive details of our lives."

~"Our anger comes easily and routinely because of our many years of training in it."

~"Our issues and conditions have a way of leaking into our identity and becoming part of who we are. We forge a bond with our dark side. We hate our sins, but we also love them. We want freedom from our struggles, but we want to hold on to them. We can't live another day wit them, but we can't imagine life without them....Spiritual formation into Jesus' likeness is liberation from sin conditions, but who will we be after we are changed? What will life be like without anger or lust or fear or control? The uncertainty solidifies us as a dabbler in Christian discipleship."

~"We learned about the impact of hurry on the human soul when we started the retreat with four hours of solitude---and found out later that half the group spent most of the time sound asleep! Their bodies were ravished by their ruthless commitment to hurry."

Saturday, March 26, 2011

my reading list for the spring and summer

Hello everybody! By the end of this weekend I will be shutting down my facebook again for an unspecified time (though I may pop back on here and there, if I need to do something). But before I go I thought I'd share with you my plans for the next season of life I'm in. In short, it's reading, reading a TON. I feel like I've been back-logged in books for the past year or so; there have been plenty I wanted to read, but when I picked them up to do so I could barely get through even a page. Somehow I knew I couldn't absorb the information, that it wasn't time yet and I needed to take care of other things both inside and out first.

Well, over the last month and a half or so I've sensed the winds of my life shifting, signs of the seasons changing, and of of the biggest evidences of this has been a growing "book-lust" (for lack of a better term). I'll go on Amazon to by a book for me or a friend and I'll just start wandering around, or I'll be in Half Price Bookstore looking through every book on the clearance rack. My "wishlist" at Amazon is about to burst from the weight of the 23 books it now contains unless I alleviate it soon. It's time to read some books over here, and I can't wait for the weather to warm up enough for me to set up a little place on the front porch to get to it!

To give you a feel for what I'm embarking on, I want to share with you the current list of books on my "to read" bookshelves. At the end I'll share what I plan and hope to gain from all this, but for now just know that it's my goal to read 30-40 of these (so not all of them) between now and Labor Day. I'd love your thoughts on any or the whole of these books, especially ones you have read yourself.

And now, in no particular order, the books on my "to read" list:

Whole Life Transformation: Becoming The Change Your Church Needs
Keith Meyer

Heaven's Calling: A Memoir of One Soul's Steep Ascent
Leanne Payne

The Complete Father Brown
G.K. Chesterton

Crazy Love
Francis Chan

New Light on the Difficult Words of Jesus: Insights from His Jewish Context
David Bivin

The Collected Short Stories of Louis L'Amour vol. 3 and 5
Louis L'Amour

Love Wins:A Book About Heaven, Hell, and the Fate of Every Person Who Ever Lived
Rob Bell

God is the Gospel: Meditations on God's Love as the Gift of Himself
John Piper

Desiring God
John Piper

After Shock: Searching For Honest Faith When Your World is Shaken
Kent Annan

Jesus the Jewish Theologian
Brad Young

Our Father Abraham: Jewish Roots of the Christian Faith
Marvin R. Wilson

Echoes of His Presence
Ray Vander Laan

God in Search of Man
Abraham Joshua Heschel

Herod King of the Jews and Friend of the Romans
Peter Richardson

The Politics of Jesus
John Howard Yoder

Apprenticeship With Jesus: Learning to Live Like the Master
Gary W. Moon

One Thousand Gifts: A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are
Ann Voskamp

After You Believe: Why Christian Character Matters
N.T. Wright

The Kingdom Life: A Practical Theology of Discipleship and Spiritual Formation
Keith Meyer

Girl Meets God
Lauren Winner

The Broken Image
Leanne Payne

Setting Love In Order
Mario Bergner

The Jesus I Never Knew
Phillip Yancey

The Gospel in a Pluralist Society
Lesslie Newbigin

The Message and the Kingdom
Richard Horsley &Neil Asher Silberman

A Rabbi Talks with Jesus
Jacob Neusner

Transformed Into Fire
Judy Hougen

A Long Obedience in the Same Direction
Eugene Peterson

A Layman Looks at the Lord's Prayer
Phillip Keller

The Unshakable Kingdom and the Unchanging Person
E. Stanley Jones

The Rest of the Gospel: When the Partial Gospel has Worn You Out
Dan Stone & Greg Smith

Kingdom Come: How Jesus Wants to Change the World
Allen Mitsuo Wakabayashi

Life of the Beloved
Henri Nouwen

Streams of Living Water
Richard Foster

In Christ
A.J. Gordon

The Ragamuffin Gospel
Brennan Manning

Simply Christian
N.T. Wright

Rediscovering the Kingdom
Myles Munroe

Surprised by Hope
N.T. Wright

The Great Omission
Dallas Willard

What's So Amazing About Grace
Phillip Yancey

The Spirit of the Disciplines
Dallas Willard

Knowing Christ Today
Dallas Willard

Abba's Child
Brennan Manning

NOT the Way it's Supposed to Be: A Breviary of Sin
Cornelius Plantinga

Renovation of the Heart
Dallas Willard

The Challenge of Jesus
N.T. Wright

Hearing God
Dallas Willard

Listening Prayer
Leanne Payne

A Traveler Toward the Dawn: The Spiritual Journey of John Eagan
edited by William J. O'Malley

The Irresistable Revolution
Shane Claiborne

Wounds That Heal
Stephen Seamands

Experiencing Father's Embrace
Jack Frost

Wired For Intimacy: How Pornography Hijacks the Male Mind
William M. Struthers

Present Perfect
Greg Boyd

The Sacred Romance
Brent Curtis & John Eldredge

Blue Like Jazz
Donald Miller

TrueFaced
Bill Thrall, Bruce McNicol, & John Lynch

Becoming Human
Jean Vanier

The Divine Conspiracy
Dallas Willard


.....................................



And that's all for now! Plenty, I'm sure, though I don't doubt I'll add a few more to that list before this season ends, as well as take plenty off after reading them. Though I didn't list those books in any order other than how they're currently arranged on my bookshelf, if you know anything about them you may have seen a few themes emerge. For one, they're almost all books that will make a person think. A good percentage of them are thick, often difficult reads in which you need to follow the author's train of thought the whole way through in order to catch the full weight of his or her beliefs and convictions. That's certainly not going to make both reading and processing them an easy task, but one of the giftings God has given me is the ability to synthesize a lot of information, especially in areas I'm passionate about, and then to share it in a relevant and coherent manner. This will be the deepest testing of that gifting yet.

But to make a process like that worthwhile, you have to have a mission, a purpose, something to gain or achieve from all that work. This is where you may or may not have spotted some of the other patterns in all those books. With few exceptions, they are all intended to answer a few basic questions I've been asking at ever deepening levels over this past year and a half, questions that have been driving me deeper and deeper in a search for understanding what it is I'm here for and how my lifelong faith in Christianity intersects that.

I think, at the most basic level, all of the questions I've been asking have at their core this question: What is the good news of God, and how does it effect the live I live now, here on this earth? Within that question I've been all over the map, as my list of books evidences. I want to know how closely the gospels we preach here in America resemble the gospel that Jesus preached. I want to know what this "Kingdom of God" is that Jesus preached so often about. I want to know how internal transformation looks like, what I need to be transformed into, and how it happens. I want to learn how to live life in the Presence of God, in communion with Him, and to make His Presence my heart's home. I want to know what proper mission looks like, what role a person endowed with the very presence and message of God can have amidst those in this world who lack one or both. I want to know what it means to come to life in the life abundant that Jesus said He came to give. I want to know what a disciple is, what one looks and acts like, what it means to be a disciple of Jesus, and what it means to make disciples of all the earth. I want to know.......I want.......I...........

"And this is eternal life, that they know you the only True God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent." (John 17:3)

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Bones, skeletons, and truth

In the last year or so I came across the best analogy I've yet seen to describe the proper place for doctrine/truth within the Christian life. It comes Phillip Yancey and Paul Brand in "In the Likeness of God", but since the whole book is full of Brand sharing (from his knowledge as a surgeon) incredible parallels between the physical body and the spiritual body, ultimately this analogy is derived from Paul.

Doctrine and truth and such are the bones of the body. They provide structure, strength, permanence, shape, sturdiness, inflexibility, and a whole host of other similar adjectives to the body. They are essential to life as we know it; a broken bone can be healed, but while it is doing so it can't be used. And a bone out of place or improperly healed can bring all sorts of pain. Bones are designed by God to do exactly what they do, and to allow us to do pretty much everything we do. A person without bones, if such a person could exixt, would not live long. And even if they did or could they would be little more than a lump of fleshly pudding. Along the same lines, have you ever seen somebody with Brittle Bone Disease? Our church works with several of them in Belize, and they literally can't do anything for themselves. If you touch them wrong you can break their bones. Such is life for those without proper bones, and such is life for those with no truth in their lives. At worst they have no life at all, and at best they are incapable of anything.

But before we glorify bones too greatly, have you ever met a skeleton? The bones themselves do not bring life either. They are living, but only in order to provide structure and so on to the greater life that their life is utterly dependent on. Bones are only of value in the context of the body and in the ongoing story of what the body is doing.

I love and will never forget the comparison analogy Brand uses to show the flip side of the proper place and role for bones. Have you ever seen a crustacean or a mollusk, say a lobster? I'm sure you have. They carry their bones on the outside; an exoskeleton. Their "truth" is hard and often even sharp, able to keep at bay the outside world or to "pierce" anytihng within reach of it's claws. Lobsters make horrible pets, because all you encounter is their exoskeleton. They're actually quite soft inside, but that softness never quite reaches the outside world nor is it ever intended to.

Now all that is fine for lobsters and such, but for a human it's a horrible way to live. Can you imagine carrying around an exoskeleton wherever you went? Not only would it be needlessly cumbersome, but it would destroy all the warmth that human touch can convey and make it quite hard to love. You may truly love somebody with your soft insides, but you'll find it quite hard to convey that when every touch you make is hard. Humans were designed with skin on the outside and bones on the inside for a reason, and there's a reason Jesus loved to touch the people He brought healing and new life to. Exoskeletons are incapable of communicating love and a whole host of other godly emotions and actions, for all that they might feel on the inside.

There's another inherent limitation to an exoskeleton, and that's that you can't grow within it. All internal growth and new life leaves you just crushed against the inside of the exoskeleton. To really grow you have to abandon the current one you inhabit and either grow or find another one, a process that can be quite difficult, possibly painful, and extremely dangerous to the soft interiors of the crustaceans and mollusks that are forced to attempt it. And they were designed for it! What happens to a human when they attempt to do the same thing? Sadly, we've seen the answers strewn across the landscape of what we call the Church here an America today. How many people do you know who are living within the cramped conditions of a shell of laws that doesn't fit the person God created them to be? How many people do you know who went off to college with an exoskeleton of "Christianity" to protect them and, when forced to grow both by college and by that age and season of life, emerged from their exoskeleton in search of something better fitting only to be devoured by godless philosophies? Lacking the ability to grow from the inside out, as bones the way God designed them in us quite naturally do, no truth dwells INSIDE of them and their only capacity for growth is found in whatever they can find and attach themselves to, regardless of whether the exoskeleton they find is living or dead.

My last point on exoskeletons is that with an exoskeleton the full extent of the freedom and life God came to give us in Him is impossible. Picture a man wearing a full suit of metal armor, a literal "knight in shining armor," ha! He may be useful in war or look quite impressive astride his horse. He most certainly is quite protected from most anything the world outside may throw at him. But can he play baseball like that? Can he sit and have a quiet meal with his family? Can he read a book, love his wife, perform most any job competently, or enjoy the sunlight? Of course not! He is a caricature; his suit of arms was designed for war and for war alone is it good for. But we Children of God war not against flesh and blood, so of what noble use would such a suit be to us when worn in relation to other people? Take it off and go play baseball, I say! Go live the life God created you to, and enabled you to do so in part through the bones He has blessed you with. And when you encounter people while playing baseball (or whatever else your delight is in), go and share your delight in God's great world with them, giving them all the love and compassion and joy He has given you and clothed you with.

And now, when someone encounters you who lacks the life that you now have, they are quite naturally drawn to you and desire it for themselves. Quite the contrast from the reaction we in the church are used to by now from the world who often encounters little but pain and condemnation from our hardened exterior of doctrines, laws, and "truth." Truth it may be, but if it is not internalized in such a way that it enables real life to dwell in and flow through the body, it is of little use. So don't put on that suit of armor! Instead:


"PUT ON then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these PUT ON love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ DWELL IN you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him."

(Colossians 3:12-17)